Sunday, March 15, 2015

Chronology - Pillsbury-Foster - Franklin Marriage from 1986 - 1998

  I can see it is very possible to finish this chronology with what I have from other websites and so an going to do this over the next few weeks, putting up the material on the Throw Mama From the Train time on and including all the nasty ugly things I have until right now.  It should be interesting.  

1977 - Labor Day Weekend - National Libertarian Convention in at the Sheraton Palace Hotel, San Francisco, California. 

I first met Craig on the cruise through the harbor which took place on one of the evenings before the banquet.  The next day he serenaded me outside the convention hall.

1978 - The children are enrolled in First Lutheran of Northridge, the school from which both Ayn and Dawn will eventually graduate junior high school. Arthur and Justin will also attend there. Having the kids in a good school was a priority that came before anything for myself, always. 

1979 - Labor Day Weekend - National Libertarian Convention in Los Angeles at the Bonaventure Hotel, Los Angeles, California. Saw Craig at a cocktail party. We talked briefly. He invited me to attend a concert he was giving. I later went to see him perform, since he had asked me to. I left before the event was over. There was something else going on, I think a dance, and I wanted to attend that instead.

1981 - August 26 - 30 - National Libertarian Convention at The Denver Hilton, Denver Colorado. I saw Craig on the convention floor. He was running for vice-chairman of the LP. I listened to his pitch (he was handing out rainbow ribbons as his campaign buttons and asking people to wear them.) I took one but voted for the other candidate. 

           My then husband, Ron Foster (Ne Kellett) agree to get a divorce and he agrees to finish the room addition which was funded by my parents so we can refinance the house and pay them off.  Ron spends all of his spare time playing Dungeons and Dungeons and barely sees the children.  We agree to start seeing other people. 

1982 - Late summer. Talked to Craig when he called the office I was running and funding on Westwood Blvd. Craig had moved to Los Angeles and was living in the Pasadena area. He was working for a guy who ran a small computer company out of his house. He was not really working full time. Consequently, he had lots of time to volunteer, which is how I became better acquainted with him. 

I kept the office open after the election and Craig continued to volunteer time. We became romantically involved after the LPC gave me a Roast at the BreaMar Country Club in the San Fernando Valley. He asked me out to dinner and a movie. That was when he actually broke up with Naudeen, the woman he had been living with in North Carolina.

1983 - I become pregnant by Craig because he had sex with me without my consent.  Ron and I agree to put off the legal divorce so he can be with me during the birth. 

February - President’s Day Weekend - Libertarian Party of California Convention in San Francisco area. I was upset about being pregnant. It was not what I wanted or planned. Craig wrote me a check for child support. The amount was $300.00.

March - National Committee Meeting at the Villa Hotel in the San Francisco area. I sent up with some friends, mostly to see Craig. We had sex. I met Dean Ahmad and his wife, Francis Eddy.
Craig continued to call me almost every day. We agreed that he would be the baby’s acknowledged father for social purposes only. We agreed to send out pre-birth anouncements to our friends.
I saw Craig several times that year. I was very unwell with morning sickness and barely able to cope with everything that needed to be done. He came down to see me and we always had sex. Once we made love in the park. Craig had never done that before. I was very pregnant by then.

October 26 - My birthday. Craig forgot about it, although I had told him and sent him a present on his birthday on July 1st. Craig called me at a friends house where I was having a birthday party. He insisted on telling me about having sent flowers to Fenton, an old girl friend for her birthday a few days before.
By this time I had arrangedto give birth at home with an MD for backup in the hospital.

November 18 - Contractions start. On the 18th my physician wanted me in the hospital for a CAT-scan. Tom Lisjac, a friend of mine, spent the night with me there, talking. I was very uncomfortable physically. The next morning Tom drove me home. I was home and walking around trying to bring on contractions when Craig arrived from San Francisco. Around early evening my midwife said I must go to the hospital. I was bleeding slightly. I had an emergency C-section. Ron went with me.
Craig was there the next day holding Justin all day. He was there continuously, leaving to sleep at night.

November 20 - Hospital Baby Dinner I had both Ron and Craig to share the baby dinner the hospital offered to new parents. I went home the next day.

December - Early in month - Craig called and asked me to pick Scott up at the LAX. I was not yet driving so refused, although he tried to insist. He told me he wanted to spend time with Jennifier Doman. I refused. Later that week the support check he sent bounced.

At Christmas Craig arrived with Scott for the holiday. He spent the days with us. He insisted that I have sex with him although he knew that I was still bleeding and healing from the C-section. I refused.

1984 - January - Craig tells me that he will send on the check to cover the hospital bills that are now due.

February - Craig again tells me he will send on the check. Then, he tells me that he lent the money to two women instead. I deal with dunning calls and damage to my credit rating for months. Eventually, he sends the money. He tells me that he lied intentionally and was justified because of my unwillingness to ‘service’ him sexually at Xmas. He continues to come down more and more often.

Late in the year - Craig gives me a wedding ring. I assume this means we are married. He is visiting very regularly now. He has changed his employment and has arranged with his employer, Microtech, to have an account paid with pre-tax dollars to cover his phone calls and travel to see me. As far as I am concerned we are married. Soon after this he buys me and the kids from Ron, who remains in the house to finish the room addition.

1986 -Craig suggests that he move down to Los Angeles and that we get legally married. He says he will change jobs to be able to marry me.

July - Craig tells me he needs a new house. He does not want our marriage to start in the house I have shared with Ron. He tells me, which he will do over and over again, that his needs must be met and it is my responsibility to meet them. 

I agree to buy another house to make him happy. Craig and I find a house in North Hills. We cannot afford the house. Craig negotiates my divorce settlement with Ron so that he assumes the liabilities for the kids and we receive $60,000 (half the value of the house on Chimineas) to put down on the new house in North Hills. I receive nothing else. We arrange financing with a second trust deed from Ken Hausman, who was found for us by our real estate agent. I borrow money from friends. ($7,500 from Tom Lisjac, $5,000 from my father, we use the kids savings accounts. Craig borrows $500 from one friend and $500 for another.) I throw my back out getting the house on Chimineas ready to finance. I will be unable to walk without pain for three years. 

            I have committed myself to the deal.
August - I drive up north to move Craig down. I had tried to do this once before but my back was so bad I couldn’t walk. I take the kids and we all help load. I drive Craig’s stuff back to the Valley. I do most of the heavy lifting while Craig lounges in bed. Craig takes the job with Green Hills and tells me he will be making much more than the basic draw in six months. In fact, his basic draw is not enough to pay for the mortgage and utilities.
It will be three years before he earns enough from his job for us to make ends meet.

Mid- September - Craig takes me out alone to lunch at the Good Earth. There he initiates, for the first time, a prenuptial contract. The agreement is this:
1. I will agree to have plastic surgery when we are out of debt. (Craig’s demand)
2. He will be able to adopt the children legally and change Justin’s name to Franklin (Craig’s demand) This will take place when we are out of debt (My demand).
3. He will bring his taxes up to date and keep them current. (My demand)
I felt stuned, shocked and hurt. He had never mentioned previously that he did not find me physically attractive. I feel trapped. Craig tells me again that it is my responsibility to make him happy.

October 1 - We move into the house in North Hills. I do all of the work myself to prepare. Craig, although there, is unwilling to help with the heavy lifting. He disappears into the bedroom as soon as it is set up. Portent of things to come.

1987 - January - Morgan moves in with us. My parents, who legally adopted her, send us money for her room and board. She starts Pierce College, they buy her a car. She starts working at Contempo and going to college at Pierce.

May 2 - I write a check to Doug Thorburn who had taken care of making out Craig’s back taxes. The check is No. 1939 for $270.00 (Taken from check register)

June 21 - Craig and I are legally married. I am angry that this has not happened earlier. Craig is sullen and angry because he decided he wanted to wait until he can have his dream wedding, although we had agreed to marry the previous summer and my agreement to fund the house and allow him to negotiate my divorce settlement hinged on that expectation.

July - I find out that my mother is dying of inoperable cancer. Craig tells me not to make such a big deal of it when I cry.

Labor Day Weekend - Craig insists we attend the LP National Convention in Seattle. I want to skip it but Craig insists we go, “because I promised him.” Craig becomes very threatening when he doesn’t get what he wants.

September 15 - My mother dies of cancer. I arrange the funeral. Craig never comforts me.

Late Autumn - We pay off Hausman loan on the houses and transfer Chimineas house to Ron.

1988 - We go ever deeper into debt. Craig is doing consulting work on the side to make ends meet. I am driving 6 hours a day, Craig to work, the kids to schools. Craig tells me over and over again that our financial troubles are my fault. He screams at me and threatens me. My back has not yet recovered from the attempt to get the house on Chimineas ready to finance and from the move. Every time I stand up I am in pain. Craig strikes me for the first time over a disagreement about archologies and their usefulness in San Luis Obispo.
That spring I make his appointment with the tax accountant and he refuses to go. He comes home and screams at me that I have lost his W2 form and it is irreplacable and he cannot file the taxes. He berates me, following me all over the house, threatening me. He forces me to look for it for a week. I start to have panic attacks and shake uncontrollably.

September - Scott moves in with us because he is unmanagable. He has been violent with his mother and run away from home. He is violent with the kids. He strikes Ed and is inappropriate with the girls. We get no child support from Elaine. His braces need to be restarted and he cannot share a room with anyone because of his violence.
I am concerned about Scott's tendencies for several reasons. When we were staying at my parent’s cabin I heard him telling the girls, who were then 11 & 12, about his first sexual experience, which was a gang rape of a girl by Scott and three of his friends. The girls and Arthur were shocked and disgusted, as was I. I told Craig about it and was very disturbed that he didn’t seem to think it was serious.
Craig tells Ed that he, Craig, owns the house and will determine where everyone will sleep. Scott, who has been inappropriate and violent, smirks at me.
Craig suggests to me that the girls should be sexually available to Scott. Scott does not know about this. It is Craig’s idea. He tells me he would have liked to experiment when he was Scott’s age. I am outraged and afraid.
I come home and find Craig with the kids in the family room. He is talking to them about me and when I sit down he tells me to leave and gets angry. I late rfind out that he had been telling the kids that I am crazy and they should not trust or rely on me. He wants them to rely on him instead. I refuse to leave and he threatens and then strikes me, knocking me out.
Scott calls the police are they arrest him. I convince them to let him go. I have double vision for several weeks and bruises over by back and breasts and right arm and on my thighs. This took place, according to Ayn, on night before the shuttle landed that year. She and Dawn have written up their memories of the evening.

1989 -
The money from Green Hills starts to come in just before the wedding. Craig is finally selling.
June 24 - Craig and I have the big wedding that he wanted so much. I have done all of the work. I have sewed the dresses, made the hats, arranged for all catering, performed by a friend of mine at cost, and the flowers and made part of the food. I have made the arrangments for the honeymoon and booked us into a bed and breakfast for the wedding night. I arranged to have a basket of goodies in the room along with champagne. A friend came with his friends to play the music. Another friend of mine does the photography. Craig does not give me a gift of any kind or arrange for anything to make the wedding special to me. But he does complain about the toast I gave him. It wasn’t appropriate, he says. That is what he will talk about for years. I wrote a booklet for the wedding with a picture of Craig’s parents and an article about my parents wedding on the same date over fifty years before. We go to Italy for the honeymoon.
The Scott Incident - Craig and I almost break up on our vacation. Scott threatened Morgan and then attacked her because she insisted he clean up after his cat. Scott ends up threatening all of the kids and running away from home to see his aunt in Virginia. He had been angry for some weeks because he wanted to visit her but Craig’s agreement with Elaine is that she will pay for visits to her relatives. She will not pay for Scott’s place fare.
I refuse to have him living with us again. Craig again batters me while I’ m driving him to work. I am pregnant. He shoves me into the door, mashing my abdomen.
Craig insists we go to counseling with Nathaniel Branden. After discovering Craig’s personal habits Brandon says, “that is disgusting. How could anyone love someone who does that?” Craig stops going to counseling.

We start looking for a house in Santa Barbara because Green Hills is moving up there.

December 20 - The baby dies and I almost die of a hemmorage having it removed. It was almost 8 months along. I am devestated. Craig goes back to work in Santa Barbara leaving me alone with the kids. He never comforts me. He tells me I failed. I cannot walk.

1990 - Money is better. I am paying off the debts we accumulated during the time Craig was not selling.

January - June Craig and I take my father, who has moved in with my sister in Santa Barbara, to Springville for the Lions Ham Dinner. Craig decides, on the spur of the moment, to buy a cabin as a present for me. I am hesitant because we are not yet out of debt. I ask how much the payment will be. I am told they will be under $500 a month. I will discover that they are actually two payments, one for $450 and the other for $1,250. We cannot afford to make the payments and begin slipping back into debt. I am frozen with anxiety. Craig begins giving Justin $100 bills and telling me I cost too much.

1991- November - Arthur moves in with Ron because I cannot deal with him. Craig has never spent time with him or been a father to him.

July - I arrange for Craig to give a performance so he can film a video of his songs being performed. I find a group, make programs, sew the dresses, arrange for a camera on loan, persuade my daughters and a friend of theirs to sing, schedule the event and pay for it with money from the household budget. Craig will later tell me that he did a favor for a group of my friends. I did not know the group. They were not friends of mine, particularly.

September - Craig has arranged to take a singer to the National LP Convention to sing his songs at a televised portion of the general session. Icaution him that the convention committee is notorious for rescinding such arrangements. He ignores me. We arrive and he is told they have cancelled his performance. He will ba allowed to perform at the cocktail party. We were not to be reimbersed for the trip, at any rate. I am paying for it out of the household budget. I point out that he can have time at the televised session if he runs for president or vice-president. he is delighted. I write his literature, a nominating speech, find supporters and deliver the nominating speech. He is delighted. It is a high point in his life. But he is not grateful.

I drive up to Santa Barbara at 10:00pm at night to take Craig his medicine. He is sick with the flu. I drive back immediately. I am getting maybe four hours sleep a night and am in constant pain with a root canal I cannot afford to have done.
Scott is spending sumemrs in Santa Barbara working for Craig. Craig is giving him 100 dollar bills, when he is giving him money at all. Scott later tells me that he always had a sheaf of money. Craig is also giving 100’s to Justin. Justin is six years old. Craig is not giving me enough money to pay the bills. When he gives mea check that is not large enough to pay the mortgage he tells me it is my fault.

1992 - April - My father dies. I mourn alone again, but I am getting used to doing that alone. I conduct my father’s funeral. I am forced to put all of the $40,000 I inherit from Father into keeping us afloat. Craig will not tell me why there is no money.

Craig begins ‘investing’ money in puts on the stock market. He tells me they will pay off, but none ever do. He screams at me and batters me three times because I object to buying puts when we can’t pay the bills.

September, Dawn goes off to college in Massachusetts.

1993 - September, Ayn goes off to College at Hillsdale, Michigan. Dawn comes home and starts college at Santa Barbara City College. I pack up the house in North Hills alone and move to Santa Barbara. Craig is in Japan. We are moved in entirely in less that two weeks. In three days you could not tell a move had taken place. I leave three boxes of Craig’s stuff in the garage. They will sit in the same spot for a whole year until Craig takes them to Green Hills.

At Halloween I give a party for our friends and, mostly, Craig’s associates from Green Hills.

1994 - January - Northridge Earthquake. Our home, just on the market, suffers major damage. Morgan is unjured in the Quake. I drive down alone on the 18th to help do what clean up can be done. It will take up 18 months to get a contractor. I had arranged for quake insurance so we will have some help rebuilding.
Craig screams at me and tells me the earthquake is my fault.
February - My sister, Anne Gripp, has a heart attack in Japan. I fly over there to be with her and stay for two weeks. I return. Craig makes me go back to Japan with him a few weeks later because, “I promised to go.” I am forced to leave my sister to die without me. I conduct a funeral for Anne at the Congregationalist Church.

Craig gets pneumonia. I make him go to the hospital and care for him. He thanks me for saving his life.

1995 - Craig invests his entire 401K in Green Chip. He is enthusiastic. He is still investing in puts. I have no say in what he does because it is his money, he says. 

More Puts. I cannot understand why Craig is spending so much money that never shows a return but when I try to talk about it he threats me, shoving me into the edge of a door and bruising my skull.

November - I put on a convention at the Radisson. I host 25 speakers from all over the country. Anne Stone attends and says it is better that the Dark Ages Weekend. 

December - I have an emergency D & C. I drive myself to the hospital and Morgan drives me home. I do not see Craig, who is at work.

1996 - We are finally climbing out of debt. But in June Craig tells me he will get no pay check. He starts selling more bonds. He borrows money from Green Hills. I will find out that his wages were levied for $150,000 by the IRS. But I will also find that that is just the tip of the ice berg. The Titanic is sinking and I didn’t know we were on a ship. 

            December 1, 1996 “Franklin Pay Stubs.

Craig tells me he is having some trouble with the tax people, but has hired a firm of attorneys. Brown & Associates, to handle it. He gives them $6,000 eventually, but they never manage to help because he refuses to give them the records. I ask if I should cut back, cancel trips but am told by Craig that it will be taken care of in just a few days or by the next pay period. But that never happens. Craig screams at me and tells me I am too stupid to know what to do. He pushes me with his forearms. 
“Brown & Associates,”

1997 - January - Craig batters me. He knocks me out, shoving me into the wall just outside our bedroom. We argued because I am worried about money and having enough to pay the mortgages, which are late after Craig told me he was taking care of his tax problems. I am worried I will not have money to pay for Ayn’s senior semester in college. 

Craig comes down with adult-onset diabetes. I go into work to get his papers together so the attorneys can take care of the tax crisis. I still do not know what can have caused it. I find the tax returns, unmailed, from 1986.

 Craig and I have a talk and he admits he has lied to me and failed to keep his promises in every particular. I agree to handle it. He agrees to fund my non-profits, give me any money I can get back and let me handle the finances. I spend three months, 18 hour days, sorting, begging pleading, saving first the money from the house in LA and then our house in Santa Barbara. I get credit from our accountant, our therapist, file a letter with the IRS citing the Americans with Disabilities Act. I have a heart attack and find myself, unconscious on the floor. I can’t go to the hospital because I must finish saving the money from the LA house. I am afraid I will die. I have an eye infection. I work through it, my eyes dry and painful. Craig calls me up, he is away on business, and yells at me, ordering me to go, but I can’t. I need the money to save the house. 

           April 16, 1997 -  “Letter from Dr. Marquart,”

           May 14, 1997 -  “IRS Correspondence,''

At the same time I am helping Morgan, as Craig promised to do. I continue to send money to Scott, as Craig promised to do while we were sinking steadily into debt the previous autumn. 

I will find out in July of 1998 that Craig told Justin that I was crazy - because I thought I could get money back from the IRS and State Franchise Tax Bureau. He told Justin that I am mentally disordered and not to be trusted. 

Morgan has stayed in the house in LA to oversee the repairs. We agreed to pay for her apartment and repay her loan to us. I buy her furniture to repay loan of $5,000. I pay for her move and expenses. It is very tight financially. She says she is still trying to make it in the film industry and Craig offered to help her. I thought his offer too indulgent but went along along, as always. I never felt as if I had any control or say in the matter. 

In April the levies stop. The taxes are filed. Money starts to come back. I start paying off the bills that have accumulated. 

May - Ayn graduates from Hillsdale and we all go to the graduation. As always, Morgan is bitchy and unpleasant. She refused to use frequent flyer miles, necessitating our purchase of tickets to accommodate her. 

I stay behind when the others leave to do research on a book and then come home and take the kids to Hawaii. My treat to myself. I use frequent flyer miles and we stay at a cheap B & B. Outside shower and few amenities. We have a great time, the only vacation I have ever had.

September 27 - Arthur has a major motorcycle accident. I spend the next five weeks with him every day. He recovers, something the doctors did not expect. But he had a brain injury that will be with him always. But he is alive. Craig goes to the hospital only once. He complains about our sex life. He insists on telling me about his fantasies about other women. He tells me about a fantasy he has had about Ayn Rand.  

            ARTICLE:  Craig and Ayn - A Love Affair Gone Wrong.

December - We decide to celebrate by taking the family to Hawaii. We have a great Xmas. Few presents but lots of hugs and good times. 

By January we will be entirely out of debt for the first time in our marriage. In November I tell Craig I am ready to schedule the plastic surgery I had promised to have. In December I talk to Craig about having a baby together. I am worried about Craig, I think he is working too hard. He tells me over and over how much the trip to Hawaii helped him relax. I have asked the girls if they want to be adopted. Arthur is reluctant. He still feels that Ron is his father emotionally. The girls are willing. Craig has always said that Dawn is the child, of the six, who is most like him. Justin is strongly unwilling to be adopted or change his name. He is not speaking to Craig because Craig beat him. Justin has written up his memories on this. Craig bribes Justin for hugs.

In December I was forced to find a program for Justin because he had barricaded hmself in his room and refused to go to school. I send him to a three week program at the School for Urban and Wilderness Survival in Idaho. I intend to send him to boarding school, although it grieves me, and begin looking for an appropriate school. While I am doing this Craig evidently had his attorney in the house going through my records. He is trying to prove we have never been married.

7239 12/28/97 Barbara Moore - $110.00 Food in Hawaii

7239 12/28/97 Henry Venning - $280.00 - Kyaking for family

December 30 - Craig becomes agitated in Hawaii over the kids, Ayn, being on my computer in the livingroom. He orders me to stop her from talking to her friends on line. I go out to ask her to stop and he storms out and wrenches the computer off the desk and pushes me into a wall. I will have bruises for two weeks.

December 31 - I am upset with Craig. I was shocked by his behavior. I drive him to the airport.

January 1 - Craig visits his attorney in Santa Barbara, I later learn. He will deposit $27,500 in my account which is half of his pay check. He will try to claim this was a payment of support, my separate property, and not money he gave me to pay household bills.

7246 1/3/98 Anaith Phillips - $350.00 - family massage, Melinda, Dawn & Ed

ATM - 1/3/98 cash, for food Hawaii

7242 1/1/98 Ayn Pillsbury - $100.00 reimbursed for cosmetics for Melinda

7246 1/3/98 Anaith Phillips - $350.00 - massage for Melinda and family.

January 7 - We return from Hawaii

7250 1/9/98 Chase Manhattan - $250.00 - Household items and gifts

7251 1/7/98 Cox Cable - $50.00 - Utility for household

7252 1/7/98 Orthopedic Surgical Group - $27.50 - Medical for Ed.

7254 1/7/98 Dr. Sandin - $17.86 - Ed, Medical

7255 1/7/98 Dr. Magneson - $127.45 - Ed, dental

7256 1/7/98 Pueblo Radiology Medical Group - $13.00 - Ed medical

7257 1/7/98 Pueblo Radiology Medical Group - $1,824.48 - Ed, medical

7258 1/7/98 RMS - $220.00 - gardener

7260 1/7/98 Editors & Publishers - $65.00 - subscription, requested by Craig.

7259 1/7/98 Orthopedic - $181.49 - Ed, Medical

7261 1/7/98 Wall St. Journal - $299.00 - subscription, requested by Craig.

7262 1/7/98 SUWS - $720 - Justin, educational evaluation from December.

7263 1/7/98 City of Santa Barbara - $240 - Water and Power

7264 1/7/98 Dr. Jones - $340 - Ed, Medical

7265 1/8/98 Cat & Bird Clinic - $232 - vet bill

7266 1/8/98 Vons - $80.00 - groceries

7267 1/8/98 Citibank - $1,300 - Craig’s credit card

7268 1/8/98 News Press - $133.35 - subscription

7269 1/8/98 Vons - $45.00 - Groceries

7270 1/9/98 Dr. Marquart - $140.00 - therapy, Justin

7271 1/9/98 Party World - $57.82 - Ed’s birthday party (Craig attended)

7272 1/9/98 Trader Joe’s - $20.28 - Groceries

7273 1/9/98 AT&T cell phone - $325.00 - Melinda’s cell phone

7275 1/9/98 Roshannah - $115.00 - cleaning house

7276 1/9/98 Vons - $20.00 - groceries

7277 1/9/98 Martinizing - $38.38 - Craig’s drycleaning for Europe

7278 1/9/98 Anesthesia Association Med. Group - $780.80 - Ed, medical

7280 1/9/98 Air Touch Cellular - $101.63 - old cell phone

  a true and exact copy of the original that is in my possession, which was written by Ruth Fisher, Esq., Bar No. 93769 for Dan O'Dowd, President of Green Hills Software and signed January 18, 1998 by O'Dowd, Hightower, and Franklin. Agreement grants stock options in amount of 600,000 to Franklin.

January 10 - I pack Craig’s bag for Europe, call him to remind him about the time, put the bag in the car and wait with engine running to take him to the airport. This is our usual routine. I do not know he will come to the house from his attorney’s office. We made love earlier in the day after he came home from work and San Jose.

7281 1/10/98 AT&T - $700 - house phone bill

7283 1/11/98 American Express - $16,070.00 - Hawaiian Trip

7284 1/11/98 Ayn Pillsbury - $400 - Xmas present

7285 - 1/11/98 - Wells Fargo - $460.00 - Credit card

7287 - 1/11/98 - Northridge emergency - $80.80 - Ed, service used December 1st.

7286 - 1/11/98 - S.B. Pulmonary Critical Care - $460.00 - Ed, for service in November

7288 - 1/12/98 - Ben Ray - $178.00 - cabin repair for plumbing

7289 - 1/12/98 - American Spectator - $54.95 - subscription for Craig

7290 - 1/13/98 - American Express Corporate Card, ACP - $2200 - for non-profits

7291 - 1/13/98 - Dawn Pillsbury - $2,000 School tuition, spring term

7292 - Susan Lundgren - $130.00 - Yoga

7293 - 1/14/98 - Vons - $220 - groceries

7294 - 1/14/98 - Prudential Insurance - $939.00 - Household insurance

7295 - 1/14/98 - Robinson’s - $62.00 - towels

7298 - 1/15/98 - Randolph Mayted - $50.00 - Arthur, household care

7300 - 1/16/98 - Dr. Marquart - $140.00 - Justin therapy

7301 - 1/17/98 - Cathedral Oaks Club - $1,135.00 - Family membership, tennis $300 extra for Craig.

7302 - 1/17/98 - Pac Bell - $101.00 - cabin phone

7303 - 1/17/98 - Gas Company - $100.00 - Anacapa

7304 - 1/17/98 - Popular Science - $17.94 (2 years) - for Ed, Xmas present

7305 - 1/18/98 - Natural Wonders - $76.45 - Xmas gifts

7306 - 1/18/98 - Dennesia Guerrero - $90.00 - house cleaner

7307 - 1/18/98 - Mobile Oil - $70.00 - gasoline

7308 - 1/18/98 - Citibank - $50.00 - Melinda’s credit card

January 18, 1998  -  “Substitute Stock Option Agreement, January 1998,  written by Ruth Fisher, Esq., Bar No. 93769 for Dan O'Dowd, President of Green Hills Software and signed January 18, 1998 by O'Dowd, Hightower, and Franklin. Agreement grants stock options in amount of 600,000 to Franklin. 

January 18 - Arthur’s birthday. We take him out to the movies at the Granada theatre. Craig and I hold hands in the dark. Later we all take Ed to Mimosa for his birthday dinner. Craig goes back to work. 

7309 - 1/19/98 - GTE - $200 - House phone

7310 - 1/19/98 - Penney’s - $20.00

7311 - 1/19/98 - Honda - $150.00 - Ayn’s car, graduation gift from last May

January 19 - Craig tells me he will be very busy all week with the Japanese coming in. He has finally signed the stock options with Green Hills. I tell him that is great, we have to celebrate. We have been waiting for this for many years. He said it will be our retirement, to replace the money he lost and then some.

Wednesday, January 21nd - Craig called while we were fixing dinner to tell me he was going out with his group from Green Hills and then bowling. I was surprised because this was very uncraigish behavior. He said he would call back later to tell me how the day’s meetings had gone. He later comes home and rummages through the refrigerator looking for left overs. He complains there is nothing to eat.

7313 - 1/21/98 - Susan Lundgren - $130.00 - Yoga

7314 - 1/21/98 - Vons - $100.00 - groceries, household.

7315 - 1/21/98 - Dr. Marquart - $140.00 - Justin’s therapy

7316 - 1/21/98 - Long’s Drug Store - $76.29 - film development from Hawaii

7317 - 1/21/98 - First USA - $1,350.00 - Hawaii trip

7318 - 1/22/98 - Martinizing - $35.72 - Craig’s drycleaning from Europe

7319 - 1/22/98 - DAR - $36.00 - Melinda, lunch

7320 - 1/22/98 - Santa Barbara City College - $42.82 - Ed’s books for school

7321 - 1/22/98 - Dennesia Guerrero - $95.00 - house cleaning

7322 - 1/22/98 - Vons - $90.00 - Groceries to make Craig his special favorites.

Tuesday, January 22nd “Citation for Conservatorship,” Because Arthur is not capable of handling his own business I ask to be named his conservator.  I do not renew it because I realize it is an unnecessary cost.  I have become his full time 24/7 caretaker. Issued by the Superior Court of Santa Barbara, Case No. 222783, Judge Thomas R. Adams.

Thursday, January 22rd - Craig called at 11:30pm and began the conversation by telling me about his day’s activities and asking about mine. I told him that Dawn and I had prepared a meat loaf and a tuna fish casserole for him and that they were in the refrigerator. He had come home on Wednesday and grumbled that there was nothing to eat in the refrigerator. I was a little surprised, since he usually eats out with clients during weeks there are meetings, but thought it would be nice to make him his favorite foods. 

I told him briefly about what he had done that day. Then he said out of no where, “I’m divorcing you.” I didn’t say anything, being too shocked to speak. He said, “Aren’t you going to say anything?” I said, “I don’t know what to say.” He then said he would be by Saturday. “for the rest of my stuff” and hung up on me without giving me a chance to respond. I tried to call him at Green Hills but he was not answering the phone, assuming he was there.

7330 - 1/26/98 - American Express - $2,910.00 - Hawaii trip

Saturday, January 24th - Craig showed up at the house at 10:30pm with a process server , hereafter referred to as Hired Flunky, who handed me divorce papers. I told him that his ‘stuff’ was in the garage and showed the pile to him. I closed the door and told him not to come back in the house. He removed the pile and came back in the house and started removing more items. I objected to this because I felt unprotected and unable to effectively monitor the process. 

While I was blocking the kitchen entrance Craig went aroundto the patio door and went in, pushing Dawn into the table. Justin witnessed this. Craig went upstairs.

I said several times that this should wait until the property dissolution, reiterating that there had been no proper notification. I was ignored by both Craig and his Hired Flucky. He and his Hired Flunky insisted on coming in the house and going through it. In my bedroom Craig insisted on looking though the dresser although I told him all of his clothing and other belongings had been in the pile he put in his car. He made comments about my using this space for my own things. He went through the family room and library and my office. He found his Objectivist Records and I had Justin take them down to his car. He forgot the Objectivist Newsletter, which remains, a blight in the middle of the library. I feel helpless, abandoned and betrayed. But the kids have been wonderful and supportive.

Sunday, January 24 - Woke up at 6am, shivering even though the room was too hot. I took three baths last night, nice long soaky ones, but it didn’t help. I need to seem strong so the kids stay calm. Justin is spending every moment with me. He is still afraid that Craig will come over without warning. He wants a restraining order in no uncertain terms. Dawn wants to have him arrested for assault and battery. It seems weird that he could be charged for assault and battery for just pushing her into the table. Times have changed for the better. The police wouldn’t arrest Craig when he broke my finger and pulled my shoulder out of the socket. Maybe I should have charged him last January when he knocked me out.

Went to church with Dawn. I was going to stay afterwards for the Women’s Wisdom meeting but Justin called on the car phone and asked where I was. I reminded him that we were at church. Seems Craig had called again. So I went home. He needed hugs and just being near me - all day. We played scrabble and went over to talk to Penny Welter. Her daughter, Taylor, held the party last year where Justin was assaulted by Craig. She said she was willing to testify. I need to get the name of the police officer who was there, too. She wasn’t there, but I left a message with Taylor. 

Started the diet again. I need to lose weight. I worry about my heart. After this is over I’m make time to go in for a check-up. 

Dinner was great. Ed came home and we were all in the kitchen cooking at the same time.. Ed told me that Craig had called down there and told him about the divorce. Also comensorated with Ron about having been married to me. No one wants to eat the meat loaf and the tuna fish casserole. Maybe I should send it over to Green Hills for Craig it was, afterall, prepared for him. 

Talked to Ayn. She had been in Cleveland visiting a friend from Hillsdale so didn’t know what had happened. Craig also called her. She said he talked to her for an hour. Never asked how she was doing, just, “How is the weather, I’m divorcing your mother.” Then the balance of the time trying to justify himself and tell her how rotten I am. She told me all about it. Guess he had to tell me over the phone the day before they served papers because I was sure to attack him with the kitchen knives. Ayn asked him is he knew of anyone in the family who had been violent besides himself. 

After dinner we went up to my room and Justin and I had Dawn read our Tarot cards. Much better than playing Monopoly with Justin. Playing with Justin is like negotiating with Bill Gates. I’ll be glad when he moves his negotiation practice on to the rest of the world. Yawns and bed.

Monday, January 25th - Called Alison first thing in the morning. I was up early because, again, I hardly slept. Justin was very quiet on the way to school. He forgot to re-sort the chess pieces for Chess Club. He was worried about telling Mr. Winn why he forgot. 

Yoga was wonderful. It helped work out some of the crinks in my sense of humor. This is ridiculous. I do know that - somewhere in here. So, talked to Alison and arranged to come over and go out to lunch to talk. But first took Arthur to school. Retrieved dry cleaning. There was one shirt of Craig’s left there. Picked it up. Guess I’ll just keep it for him. I have two more boxes of his books and other stuff I found, too. 

Picked up Ed and he and Dawn and I headed out to Montecito to see Alison. Had lunch at Peabody’s. She forgot her money, so I treated. Kind of funny. I can tell this divorce is going to be very repetitive. Same things over and over. One surprise, Craig listed our day of separation as January 1st. I said, Huh? Alison asked me what happened in that period and I told her we had sex and then on the 10th I packed his bag for Europe and had the car waiting in the alley, bag loaded, to take him to the airport. All was pretty normal. He had been in San Jose for a night or two that week. He hardly stayed home, kept going back to work, but that is normal just before a trip. Then when he came back from Europe he took a cab to Green Hills and went to work again. Meetings the next week, all week, he said. Craig did take time to come home and celebrate Ed’s 20th birthday with us. We went to see Hard Rain at the Granada and then out to dinner at Mimosa. Then he went back to work. He told me that day the stock options had been signed and I said we would have to celebrate. Looking back on this conversation it was odd that he didn’t want to talk more. Craig always wants totalk about his successes. 

Alison asked what our relations had been like, in the period to time between January 1st and January 23. 

Well, I said, When we came home from Hawaii Craig was getting ready to go up to San Jose for meetings. I had known this since we had talked nearly every day on the phone, as usual. When we returned home I had to schedule a meeting with Justin’s educational consultant and get Ed back to rehabilitation. On Friday Justin had an appointment with Dr. Marquart, his therapist. Dr. Marquart thought Justin might be able to make it at home and be able to go back to Goleta Valley Jr. High. So we agreed to a trial. Justin started back to school on the 13th. 

Craig called me while he was in Europe and we talked. Very normal. When he came home he dumped his dry cleaning in the bin and I took it along to the cleaners. That Thursday, the 22rd, I had put his newly clean underwear in his dresser just before I went to bed at 11:30. They were still warm when I took them out and stuffed them in a plastic bag at 11:45.

Called Craig at his hotel. Was he surprised. He asked how I found him and I told him that I just called the motel closest to Green Hills. Oh, he said. I just wanted to hear his voice. We didn’t talk about much. He wanted to talk about the divorce but I kept telling him I just needed to feel near him. I told him that he was my best friend and I missed talking. He said he did, too. Stupid. I won’t call again.

Tuesday, January 26th Took Justin to school and after feeding him at McDonalds took him home. He is very depressed and scared and wanted a day to vegetate. I want one too, but it won’t be today. Ed had to be at rehab at 9am. Then came home and called the attorney. Told her a few things I remembered. Picked Ed up from rehab and when I came home Dawn told me we needed to go out to the attorney’s office so she could sign some more papers. We went. I had an idea. Since I can’t seem to get the time to write anything else now why not write the story of this divorce and see if I can sell it. Great study of the effects of abuse and how it can manipulate your thinking. Love the scene where Craig buys me from Ron. Alison liked the idea, so I am doing it. I didn't have title until 4am this morning and then I realized the title is, A Woman’s Primer for Individual and Political Justice . I laughed. 

Alison told me I needed to put together an expense statement and demands, so I spent the rest of the day doing that. I hate that kind of paperwork. Did take Ed to school to pick up a paper.

Wednesday, January 28th School for Justin. Class for Ed. Yoga for Dawn and myself. That took care of the morning. Afternoon talking to attornies and faxing papers. What a life. I did take the boys down to get the long-promised bikes. Dawn and Justin drove home and I took Ed and his new bike in the car. Pizza all around for dinner. Crashed early.

Thursday, January 29th Justin told me that he had a nightmare about Craig. He it was horrible - and it was. I told him to discuss it with his therapist on Friday. Arthur missed therapy. He forgot about the change of location. But the therapist was glad because he now understand how important it is to use his daytimer. Justin took the bus home from school, which saved me some driving. Talked to Alison and Ron about the documents I sent yesterday. I made chili for dinner and Dawn baked the corn bread. The kids and I played Scrabble and went to be around 9pm.

Friday, January 30th Justin did not go to school today because I expected to be on our way to Yosemite. But that cannot happen because of my eyes and the condition of the car. Worries me, the sound from the brakes. So we slept in a little and went out to breakfast at Cajun Kitchen on de la Vina. Then I took Ed to school and then to Rehab. He is going to walk home. I’m keeping my fingers crossed. Ed went to spend the week-end with Ron in L.A.. Justin, Dawn and I sent to see Deep Rising, a stinker of a movie if there ever was one. Then we went to Borders to use the certificates Craig gave out to all at Xmas. I let Justin use mine.

Saturday, January 31 Just the three of us home today. I started cleaning out the closet in the library and couldn’t find the material for Kathy’s dresses. I am sure that Craig took the bolt and patterns. I called Scott and told him to find out for sure. I felt very down. Justin is spending a lot of time with Peridot. He sure loves that cat.

Sunday, February 1 Dawn and I went to church today and then to the Women’s discussion meeting. It was an interesting experience. The people are very nice but it is strange to know that they are all liberals. We went home and picked Justin up and went to lunch at China City in Goleta. Justin had Arby’s. Then we went to Blockbuster and rented a video. When we arrived home Scott called and told me that he had talked to Craig and ascertained that he had indeed taken the material and that he does not want me at the wedding. He also does not want me to make the dresses for Kathy. Scott said he was upset. Craig also said he could not send him the money for rent because he had, “spent it on himself and his attorney.” He was upset also that Craig cut him off after the requisite 3 minutes. I told him I would try to find some money for him and send it tomorrow. I know this is hard on him, feeling as if he is in the middle - and he is, much more than Justin in some ways.  

I did send him money to find out he was siding with Craig but milking me for as much as he could get.  I then demanded he return it.   A few weeks later he did return it. 

Later, I talked to Ayn who said Craig had called her and wanted to talk. He had told her that I was going for more than 50% but he didn’t know if that was me or my attorney. He asked how I was. Teflon Ayn told him I was writing again, when I don’t have migraines, and doing well. Dawn and I worked on our belly dancing outfits a little and then played hearts with the boys until bedtime. It is raining like the dickens.

Monday, February 8 - I have pressure and pain in my chest and up into my neck and back and down my left arm. I go to the emergency room at Cottage Hospital and an admitted to the cardiac unit. I call the Morgan, Scott, Ayn and Craig. Craig hangs up on me. I cry.

Tuesday, February 9 - Justin refused to go to school. although there was no one to take him, anyway since Dawn can not drive. He comes to the hospital and sits my my bed until I am discharged. I feel terrible, like I have been run over by a truck. I am still having the symptoms on and off. I am frightened. I do not want to die and leave my children. I write a will when I arrive home. I need to have the attorney do something about a will.
I decide I need a change. I will go to the Libertarian Convention in L.A. I call and make reservations. I call Jack and we talk about what is happening. It is like old times.

Wednesday, February 11 - I receive a call from the convention organizer telling me I am not welcome at the convention. This has never happened in the history of the LP. I call and am told that she has been told I am violent. Ic all Jack. Twenty minutes later the disinvitation is rescinded by Mark Hinkle, the state Chairman. He was told that I would, “cause a scene at the banquet, and am violent.” He was told this by Michael Emerling Cloud.
I am furious. I served as a state officer in California for this organization for six terms. I was county Chairman in LA for two terms. I ran 24 campaigns, ran for office, State Senate, funded and ran two offices, raised thousands of dollars, held ever lower office that exists, planned and carried out protests and wrote press releases. Craig has never held an office in the organization. He was there as my come-along.

Thursday, February 12 - I take magazines and mail over to Craig at El Prado. He refuses to thank me, saying that I have nothing better to do anyway. He is angry that I am going to the convention. I tell him that he has no right to try to prevent me from going and he says he does, that Michael should be able to keep me away.

Saturday, February 14 - Dawn and I go to the convention in Los Angeles. I see old friends and have a great time. I have made appointments to see Dolores White and Armand Santomayor, both friends from the Republican Party. Armand is thinking of running for city council. I promise to send him information about enterprise zones and other info of interest. I make a note to contact Poole at Reason and get him on their lists. Dolores has decided not to run for State Senate this time. At the banquet Craig will pay $1,000 to get up and play a song. He does a terrible job, out of breathe and out of practice.

Tuesday, February 16 - I cut my finger unloading the dishwasher. Another trip to the emergency room. They sew it up but it will not heal, it will become infected. This will be a problem for a week or more. I will go to Dr. Danson for treatment and receive antibiotics. I cancel Craig’s reservation to the Reason Weekend. He had said he didn’t really want to go, anyway. Reason, and supporting it, has always been my thing, anyway.

Inappropriate sexual conduct and abuse towards children

In 1988 I had shocked and appalled by Craig’s suggestion that it would be appropriate for my daughters to be “sexually available’ to his son, Scott. Craig and I had had a very angry argument, duringwhich he had threatened me. But I told him, in no uncertain words, that the mere suggestion was completely sick and he dropped the subject. But over the years I noticed the following behavior which troubled me. 

Craig would generally keep at least his underwear on in our bedroom. He did not parade around the house unless he put on a robe. But when the girls became older and especially after we were living in Santa Barbara and Ayn was in college and Morgan was visiting, he would remove all of his clothes and walk around our bedroom with the door open. The behavior took place most frequently while they were home. I asked him to please remain clothed since I know it upset the girls, who had to pass by our room on the way downstairs, but he told me that family nudity was normal. I responded by telling him that in that case the family would engage in the practice and not just one member. None of us ever ran around the house even half dressed. 

During the same period of time Craig’s behavior towards my son, Justin, changed. Justin had become very interested in playing chess. Craig wanted to play with him but would insist Justin come up to our room so that Craig could play while sitting naked on the floor with the door open. No one else was ever unclothed. I actually typically dress in the bathroom myself.
Craig’s behavior towards Justin was both manipulative and violent. He battered Justin several times but earlier the more troublesome thing was his tendency to try to manipulate Justin into attaching himself to him in strange ways. 

Justin later told me that Craig would tell him that he had to completely discount everything I said and trust him instead. I thought this was bizarre, but later realized it was the same behavior he had shown in 1988 with his meeting in the family room. 

It didn’t work. Justin started avoiding him. I include Justin’s statement on some of the incidents that took place before I sent Justin away to a treatment program. I should have sent Craig, instead.

I started talking to Morgan again this week. She told me that her relationship with Craig had become increasingly strange. She said that Craig told her that he had been having sexual fantasies about both her and Ayn for a long time. He asserted to her that this was normal.

Craig had forced her to convert the money he had given her into a loan, also forcing her to sign a document saying that she had not had intercourse with him. Since when this happened I had not considered this as a possibility I was surprised at the timing when Morgan told me about it.

She then told me that he had insisted that the good by hugs she give him increase in length.
Morgan lived in a two bedroom apartment in Los Angeles and Craig would visit her there and use the bed in the second room. In late 1998 he came down to visit and came into her bedroom after she was in bed. He laid down on the bed with her saying that his belly was too heavy for him to stand up while he talked. She got up and put on her robe and left the room.
Not long afterwards she got rid of the bed in the second room so he could not visit overnight any more. 

September 17th - Outraged he is unable to finance the buy out of Green Hills Software, Inc., Glenn Hightower files a law suit claiming he has been intentionally thwarted.  He was.  Perhaps he deserved it. 

[a.] Glenn Hightowervs. Daniel O'Dowd, Case No. BS 053127, Superior Court of the State of California for the County of Los Angeles, September 17, 1998, DECLARATION OF WAYNE B. WEISMAN FILED BY APPLICANT GLENN HIGHTOWER IN SUPPORT OF APPLICATION FOR PRELIMINARY INJUNCTION”

[b.] “Glenn Hightowervs. Daniel O'Dowd, Case No. BS 053127, Superior Court of the State of California for the County of Los Angeles, HIGHTOWER'S OPPOSITION TO O'DOWD'S MOTION FOR ORDER DISSOLVING PRELIMINARY INJUNCTION, December 15, 1999, Filing Date September 2, 1998; [c.] Glenn Hightower vs. Daniel O'Dowd, Case No. BS 053127, Superior Court of the State of California for the County of Los Angeles, RESPONSE TO OBJECTION TO (PROPOSED FIRST MODIFIED INJUNCTION, December 15, 1999; September 17, 1998

[d.] “Glenn Hightowervs. Daniel O'Dowd, Case No. BS 053127, In the Court of Appeal of the State of California, Second Appellate District, REMITITUR,” Copy of original order, opinion or decision entered in the above-entitled cause of July 1, 1999 and that this order, opinion or decision has now become final, signed by Joseph A. Lane, Clerk, September 3, 1999. Opinion Hightower is likely to prevail if there is proof of unlawful action by O'Dowd.

[e.]AMERICAN ARBITRATION ASSOCIATION No. 72Y 180 0960 98,” a true and exact copy of the originals that are in my possession, which is a series of documents generated by the law suit filed by Hightower against Dan O'Dowd over O'Dowd's exercise of their sudden death partnership agreement on January, 1998. Decision that unlawful action is not proved.

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